[On Negative Book Reviews] Is there a golden rule when writing reviews?

[All this week, WWAATD contributors wax poetic, lyrical and philosophical on the pitfalls, perils and passions of the negative book review.—Ed.]

It’s ever and always easier to be cynical, to “poo-poo” the subject of review.

But what good does that do? If a reviewer does not like something, is the negativity spewed out of regret over having spent the time engaging some work? Should the artist be verbally crucified, tarred and feathered, or made to wear a kick-me sign? Why did the artist/author do this?

As reviewers what do we get out of this? Are we tastemakers whose opinions are the golden goose eggs of the moment?

It is much more difficult to open up and give credit where credit is due. My subjectivities are my own, but I like to think I can see when someone has perhaps technical prowess, or is a pastry chef of hyperbole able to create delicate wonderment. Are we too lazy to find an angle worthy of discussion?

Is not one man’s doggerel, another man’s amused wet-dog like sentiment. Would you rather a bone to pick or one to bury?

Maybe negative reviews serve to martyr the reviewed? Are negative reviews cautionary tales of genre and style? Do not read, the pitfalls are too many, too great. Should we not try to figure out our audience or perhaps redefine that of the reviewed? If this book, movie, etc, is not for me, who is it for? Maybe it’s not a question of negative or positive, but rather one of substance. Negative reviews give us the chance to explore the Keatsian idea of negative capability. Help the potential reader to read with a purpose.

If as reviewers, we can give meaning or purpose then our time was not wasted and we will not have wasted another’s. I believe in positivistic criticism, at least in a tit-for-tat way. Barb it with caveats if you are overcome with vitriol or filled with Napoleonic self-righteousness.

What is the golden rule of reviews? If you can’t scribble praise for at least one noteworthy line, pick up a new book, poem, etc, and pray that it’s worthy of something good to say?

Perhaps silence is harsher? Is a negative review better than no review at all?

At this point I want to prove that my golden eggs aren’t just lemons painted gold.