Getting to know: Paul Siegell.

[In which WWAATD asks vapid questions culled from various teen magazines to non-vapid, non-teenager types.]

Full Name: Paul Michael Siegell (yup, PMS!)

Age: 33

Height: A ReVeLeR @ 5’11er”

Currently Live: Queen Village, Philadelphia, PA

Hometown: Roslyn, NY (but I went to Herricks High).

Instruments: Google, Ghat, Helvetica, the mandolin, the space bar, toilet paper, whatnot.

Car: SEPTA TransPass, otherwise shotgun in my fiancée’s VW.

Secret Talent: I was instructed never to speak about it.

What is the best thing about your job? Ha! Wouldn’t they like to know?

What was your most embarrassing audition moment? He tried to play it off, but the guy judging me farted, seriously, and I just busted out laughing. Twelve with a clarinet. What the hell was I supposed to do? Couldn’t stop. Killed the whole deal.

If you could live in any past era which would it be and why? Paris, France around the time Jacques Lipchitz first met Juan Gris. Also, I would love to have seen Jimi Hendrix play live.

Who is your role model and why? My extremely hardworking father.

What do you do for fun? Just got back from PHiSH Super Ball IX in Watkins Glen, NY. Four nights of camping, three days of music, two crazy friends, one wook-tastic weekend. Also, we just got tickets to My Morning Jacket at the Mann Music Center in August, so I’m pretty stoked about that.

Do you have a good luck charm? I used to rely on the little green Snork, Tooter. Remember him? He’s the one who couldn’t speak.

Wackiest fan encounter: I always find it wacky when someone wants to buy one of my books from me. I love it, and hope for it, always, but at the same time, it’s all incredibly strange.

Before I die, I want to: have written a truly good poem.

When I fly I have to have: a ticket.

If I had to spend $10 at my favorite fast food joint, I’d order: Tacos! Or Pho.

My coolest article of clothing: Grateful Dead t-shirt that I stole from my oldest sister like 15-20 years ago and have never worn.

My first financial splurge was: Over fifth grade winter break I shoveled driveways, and with the 100-something bucks I made I bought myself a TV. Thirteen channels of leave me alone.

When friends come over, we: Come over and find out. As Alex says in A Clockwork Orange, “You are invited.”

Do you like to cook? If so, what? I’m really good at cutting vegetables.

TV show I never miss: Back in the day: Fraggle Rock. Nowadays: Flyers games. But, man, do I miss West Wing.

If you could interview any celeb whom would it be and why? I went to elementary, middle and high school with J.P. Rosenbaum. One of the guys on this season’s The Bachelorette. (His older brother used to call me “P.A.U.Smell.”) Anyway, J.P. and I, we gotta talk.

Anything about yourself you wish you could change? I miss my long hair.

I’ll eat sushi, but not: Ham. Blech.

What are your best and worst subjects in school? Really did well with the Athletic Training and Sport Medicine program my high school had. Really sucked at Spanish.

If you could be granted 3 wishes, they'd be: Sing it with me: “Prince Ali! Fabulous he! Ali Ababwa. Genuflect, show some respect. Down on one knee! Now, try your best to stay calm. Brush up your Sunday salaam. Then come and meet his spectacular coterie…”

If I could gay-marry anyone in the world, he/she would be… Christopher Walken.

Where on earth are you most dying to go? I’d like to spend some time in the forests of Japan.

What’s the last thing that made you cry? I’d rather not say.

Do you ever wish you could just be a normal kid? Not when ~@~ transforms into a fly-ridden pile of poop on gchat! Try it. You’ll see.

What would people be surprised to know about you? I tend to get extremely nervous before readings. Once I’m up and going I’m solid. It’s the before that tweaks me.

If you had to name one song as your theme song, what would it be? I am Hydrogen by PHiSH.

Have you had a starstruck Hollywood experience? Who was it with? A few weeks ago ComicCon came to Philadelphia and my coworker convinced me to go with him. I only said yes because we were able to get in for free, being that we work at the newspaper and can kinda-sorta rock the press pass. I was pretty much feeling a little too cool for school on the way over, but once we got inside and I saw Chewbacca, I pretty much geeked out all over myself. Wookies!

FAVORITES

Favorite Actor/Actress: Michael Cera and Marlon Brando, Natalie Portman and Ingrid Bergman. And John Cusack.

Favorite Movie: Animal House

Favorite Body Part: Her tongue.

Favorite Singer: Page McConnell for his tenderness, Jim James/Yim Yames for his lift, and Thom Yorke for his eeriness. Other than that, it’s a toss-up between Louis Armstrong and Ella Fitzgerald.

Favorite Song: Me and Bobby McGee as sung by Janis Joplin.

Favorite Candy: Reese’s Peanut Butter Cups, please.

Favorite Philosopher: Icculus.

Favorite Ice Cream Flavor: Kessel’s Korner in Ocean City, NJ makes this fresh peach sundae thing in the summer. It’s pretty much the most fantastic thing I think I’ve ever had.

Favorite Sport: Currently: Jacques Lipchitz hunting.

Favorite Sports Team: Philadelphia Flyers.

Favorite Athlete: Choooooooooooooooooooooooch!

Favorite Book: The Helping Friendly Book. Or, A Clockwork Orange by Anthony Burgess.

Cell Phone or iPod: I just got an iPhone!

Summer or Winter: Snowball fiiiiiiiiiiiiight!

Ice Skating or Gymnastics: Short track speed skating and whitewater kayak slalom.

LA or New York: Fuhgeddaboudit!

Skiing or Snowboarding: Hot cocoa, little marshmallows, whipped cream.

Chocolate or Flowers: Best thing I ever gave her was an Appa plush. Six legs, 18 toes, five stomachs and a whole lotta love.

Dogs or Cats: She wants a bulldog, a little “bully friend,” so what am I gonna do?